Monday, October 19, 2009

Pride

pride: inordinate self-esteem: conceit (Merriam Webster)
pride of heart: a disposition of mind to exalt ourselves (C.G. Finney)

It seems to be my daily prayer that the Lord would humble me, and break me of my pride. I see glimpses of my prideful heart on a daily basis and it disgusts me. I continually think thoughts of I deserve more...Its really all about me...I know how to do things better than others...I can get through today without time in the Word...I don't have time to stop and help (what I have to do is way more important than your need)...I am better than this or that person...I can do it on my own...and the list goes on. I pray that the Lord would reveal to me the pride in my heart and show me the true condition that my heart is in. I want to grieve when the Lord grieves so that means seeing my heart the way He sees it which is pretty scary. Pride is something that I think everyone struggles with on some level because we are all sinful and human, however as believers we are to take our pride and hand it over to the Lord so He can work in us and humble us. The Truth is I can't make it without the Lord, I'm not better than anyone else, its not all about me, my needs are no more important than the next person and I need to continually ask the Lord to humble me and break my of my sinful, prideful heart. I know this is something that I will probably always struggle with this side of heaven, but admitting something is the first step to recovery, right?

"History is the story of redemption. This story is much bigger than I. I am not the main character in the drama of redemption. I am not the point. But by God's grace I am part of it. My subplot is integral to the whole. It is far more significant to have a small part in this story than to star in my own puny production. This is a cosmic story that will run throughout eternity. Will I play my part with grace and joy, or will I go for the short-term, insignificant story that really has no point?" -Susan Hunt

"Let the words of my mouth and
the meditation of my heart,
be acceptable in your sight,
O Lord, my rock and my redeemer."
-Psalm 19:14

"Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thougts!
And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting."
-Psalm 139:23-24
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